he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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