I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
