is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
