can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize