in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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