K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize