"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
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