Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
