have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
My pussy is not your playground.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
