Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
My vagina is officially offended.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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