I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
I don't think brook has ever known best
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
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