"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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