yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize