You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
They took my balls.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Randomize
