For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
