Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
