At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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