I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
