so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
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