so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize