I'm really into asian looking animals
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
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