Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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