2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
