Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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