I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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