Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
