I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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