The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Dear god my vagina.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
