If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize
