This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize
