I am spending my child support on dildos
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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