sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
