why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
