you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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