I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
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Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize