Sponge bath it is.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
