the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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