I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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