AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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