I'm really into asian looking animals
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
