Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
