remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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