I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
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