Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize