am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
