Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
