they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
