So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
