my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Randomize
