I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
