I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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