That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
